The Attic Church

Because my devotionals are autobiographical and sometimes raw, many of my readers feel safe to write me and share their own life stories.  Over the past 10 years, one of the things I have learned from them is that favoritism, neglect—even child abuse—know no socio-economic, racial or religious boundary.  I have also learned that those who were mistreated as children never realize true joy as adults until they decide to face the past and move on. 

 If you know someone who was robbed of a loving parent, I hope you will invite them to come to The Attic Church with me. If you have no idea what this poem means, say a prayer of thanksgiving that you’re clueless. You were blessed.

 The Attic Church

 I went to church in the attic today
Never ever expecting
To end up this way.

 I had wandered upstairs to go through some old stuff,
‘Cause I thought Father Time
Had finally lapsed just enough

To wade through my childhood with all of its tears,
To face those old demons
And sad memories seared.

 As I looked through the photos, my stomach did churn
That snaggletooth smile with
Her innocence burned.

 I then saw their faces, now the challenge was cast.
I knew it was time to make
Peace with my past.

 I finally prayed, “Why did this happen to me?”
He whispered, “My Child,
“They didn’t know me.

 “But I am your God, yes I am holy but more,
You know I’m your Abba
And you’re the one I adore.

 “Mothers and fathers make mistakes, often sin
But that cannot define you
Or rob your peace from within.

 “You can choose to forgive and embrace a new life
Or you can stay stuck in the past in
Hatred and strife.”

 I fell to my knees, “God help me forgive”
He said, “You can do it.
Girl, go and live!

 “Live life to the fullest, put away your dark past,
Throw away all their wrongs
And you’ll find peace at last.”

 I’ll be honest with you, I had held on for so long
To my anger and sadness
I knew not how to move on.

 But it was now time to choose peace over pain
So I prayed for His strength
In His Son’s Holy Name.

Walking down from the attic, finally free
I just couldn’t believe
He came to church there with me.

Ellen Miller