Dear Girlfriends,

After reading Kathryn Stockett’s, The Help, my daughter Shauna, my mother-in-law Harriett and I scheduled a “girl date” to watch the story together on the big screen.

Rarely do movies move me. I am a reader and prefer drinking in the words from a gifted author and becoming lost in their story as I add my own mental visual effects.

But this movie was different for me. The characters felt real, not manufactured, and the brilliant dialogue was true to Ms. Stockett’s novel. Especially when Aibileen speaks softly to little Mae Mobley.

This is your SPOILER ALERT if you haven’t read the book or watched the movie because I am about to share with you the nine most important words spoken in this story.

Aibileen, an African-American domestic housekeeper understands that her most important role in the household she serves is how she shapes the mind, heart, and soul of the child she keeps charge over. Aibileen knows that what we are taught to believe about ourselves affects who we become. As she holds the little blonde on her lap, Aibilieen tells her:

“You is kind. You is smart. You is important.”

As Aibileen whispered the words I held my breath; tears welled up; and, for that moment – I was Mae Mobley. Wow. If I can be shaken to my core – imagine the impact these words could make on our children!

Aibileen didn’t tell Mae Mobley to “be nice.” She told Mae Mobley she already had a good heart. Imagine today’s teenagers, many who believe you have to be cruel to rule, knowing that being thoughtful and kind was not something to aspire to or achieve but is by definition who they are.

Abileen didn’t tell Mae Mobley to “try hard”. She told Mae Mobley she already possessed the ability to reason. Imagine today’s kids, those struggling with learning challenges, understanding that their intellect is realized in something beyond a grade and knowing that their mind is recognized – by you – as a valuable asset.

Abilieen didn’t tell Mae Mobley “you’re special”. She told Mae Mobley she had the attitude it takes to move mountains. Would we not all take on bigger battles to solve real world problems if someone had encouraged us to believe that we could be a catalyst for change? Imagine the positive swell we would all create if we moved from believing that we’re special (or for some, invisible) to knowing that we matter.

If you haven’t seen the movie, I recommend it. If you haven’t told someone, “you are kind; you are smart; you are important”, I hope, like me, you will be inspired to follow Aibileen’s example.

I can’t help believe that these nine words can’t shape a child’s perspective – and maybe even reshape our own.

You is loved,
Ellen