Dear Girlfriends,
What are the secrets to living an honorable life? The advice is endless. You can read about them in books or in magazines. You can watch the discussions on Oprah. You can go to a psychologist, hire a coach, or learn about them online. You can even chime in on the topic on blogs, like mine. But have you ever seen what the attributes of an honorable life look like?
On December 7, 2007, I fell in love for the first time in 18 years, and I fell hard. Tears flooded my eyes and my mind raced as I looked upon the precious face of my first grandchild, Ava, and considered all she would behold in her lifetime and the important lessons she would learn. My role as her grandmother (I’m coaching her to call me Sugar) seemed a daunting one as I considered all my grandmother had been to me: my teacher; my playmate; my confidant; my spiritual advisor; my role model. How would I compare to the greatest Mammaw of all time? (But don’t call me Mammaw – I’m way too hip.)
For the next several weeks after Ava’s birth, I kept a list of the things that I hoped she would see in her lifetime. Although the list is long, it doesn’t include Disney World, Miley Cyrus, or the shoe department at Niemen’s. No. My list includes intangibles; intangibles that due to a change in our social fabric, our busy family lifestyles, or our lack of mindfulness or creativity, we fail to model for our children and grandchildren. And, unfortunately, due to the fact that many of us were raised in not-so-perfect households, these are some of the same intangibles that were not modeled for us.
So what are some of the things on my list that I want Ava to see?
Timeless Honor
Selfless Devotion
Genuine Respect
Work/life Balance
Considerate Inclusion
Meaningful Traditions
Mindful Appreciation
Working Friendships
Marriage Partnerships
Successful Divorce
Successful divorce? Yep. There’s a lesson here for all of us.
Because children are always watching (and because teenagers never listen), we know for a fact that our actions speak louder than words. So let’s begin the important discussion as to how we, as sisters, aunts, godmothers, mothers, grandmothers, and great-grandmothers, can model an honorable life for our next generation.
Standing in some very big Mammaw shoes,
Ellen
a.k.a. Sugar
Ok, now “Sugar-Pops-Cheerieos!” Has a nice ring to it!
Great article and you are right on target, Mammaw’s shoes are mighty big, but it is certainly worth the effort!
Keep up the good work!
(P.S. – I’m soooooo tempted to have something embroidered with the words “Mammaw” on it and given to you!)
Okay, you’ve really got me hangin’. “Successful divorce”….as you know, I have 2 precious grandbabies myself, and I have been divorced. I can’t wait to read your next Truth Nugget. As always, I’m sure you have something wonderful to share. Thank you for your commitment and love that you have for your “girlfriends”!!